Life as an honorary scouser...

Like all true Reds my early morning routine involves checking the Liverpool website and every site I know for evidence of a new signing. And while the two confirmed signings both excite and intrigue me, it seems there has been a fair degree of panic in many of our red family as to what Kenny and Commolli are up to.

Here are my naïve thoughts on the “what?” and “why?” behind this summer’s business:

1.    Champions League

Without the carrot of Europe to dangle, we were always going to struggle to attract certain players. Clichy’s recent snub was evidence of how significant this fact is. (He’s not a bad left-back, but certainly not a world-beater. If he has chosen a club based on this fact alone – or so he claimed – then those of world-beater status will surely do likewise).

2.    Wage-bill

We cannot offer the wage packet the likes of the Manchester clubs and Chelsea can (because we don't have a rich owner who can bank-roll it or a big enough stadium to fund it). Paying 100,000+ pounds a week to every Tom, Dick and Harry (or in our case, Young, Nasri and Modric) means we will also miss out on certain players we may otherwise hope for. (Plus, we have to many 'pretenders' sitting on big wages that need to be offloaded ... and fast!)

This also seems to be a reason for us being willing to pay inflated upfront prices to ensure we get a young player who will be content with a lower weekly wage. (And personally I think both Carroll and Henderson will be worth the money at the end of the day).

3.    Imminent fairplay restrictions

While this is surely not a determining factor, it is in the mix – and rightly so. Not only is it a factor our new owner’s have to consider but with their brilliant long term strategy – which in the day of instant success may be undervalued at present – it is very much part of their master-plan. (Perhaps this third point would be better headed by the phrase, “New owner’s master-plan”).

These three factors alone – undoubtedly there are more – mean that we need to remember we’re in the process of rebuilding. Kenny has to rebuild a team capable first of getting back into Europe and then … we can set our sights on winning the Prem and Europe too.

This is not to say that we cannot challenge for the league next year. I believe we can … with our two new signings (Adam’s intrigues me no end; but that’s for another article) – along with a fit Stevie, Carroll and Agger (he is more important to us than most realise; but that’s also for another article) – and hopefully one or two new signings, I really believe we can challenge for the Prem, especially if, as it seems, the other top four teams are also in their own rebuilding processes.

Let me mention one more factor – not at all a part of Liverpool’s strategy but a factor that affects the mood of us, the fans …

4.    Media spin

I read somewhere that Liverpool was linked to over 60 players in the month of June alone by the spin-doctor press-gurus … who should all be drawn and quartered. Mind you, that’s their job (to sell ‘dreams’ to addicted fans).

As supporters, we should not be drawn into such speculation (or at least remember that there is a night and day difference between speculation and fact). What we can probably count on is this: what the media, and especially those self-professed “in-the-know” experts, proclaim as gospel truth is more than likely smoke and mirrors. (I wonder how laughable – or irritable – Kenny finds these claims … although he probably doesn’t even read them). Factor in the deception of the media, multiplied by 500 to the power of 60, every time you get excited or confused or angered by a “possible” player we’re linked to … and you’ll keep your head.

Of course, after I’ve finished this rather clinical article I’m going to check the web again for today’s “potential signing”.

After all, I’m addict … just like you.

Life of a teenager

*Please note: those of you brave enough to take the plunge and read such a misleadingly titled blog, will begin skimming the page to assess if there are any diary-entry moments worth laughing at. I assure you, I have written about no such events that I have been subject to. Tales of having hair removal cream poured into my boxers or crying at the passion exuded by fellow Liverpool fans will remain private. Instead, read on for my confused and naïve take on many inconsequential things.

To say that I have started a blog to boost my employability post university is to state a fact. Yet that does not mean that I cannot enjoy doing so; I mean right now I am enjoying writing in such a fashion that makes me sound conceited and superior, thus making me feel important. However, it has finally hit me that the life of a teenager bears little or no impact on current affairs. To make a rather large leap in my thought process, an inevitable question will be: what is the point in life? But that is far too philosophical to get my head around at nay on 9 O’clock, and I cannot imagine anyone reading this would find it a question worth answering anyway – you all know that dressing up, getting rather drunk and watching football is the way forward right? Anyway, excusing the immature interruption, I am sure you can see where my apathetic ramblings are going, after all, you are intelligent enough to have chosen my blog as one to read. Maybe you are even a fellow blogger, which implies you have a gift with words, a skill that every Harry, Dick and Charlie admire. Now this is the power I want. This, writing a blog, is a more personal reason as to why I have started blogging. Without beating round the bush (for once), I am simply saying I am happy to be doing what I love the most, and can only hope that you respect me for doing what I love – attempting the impossible. Now one thing that I am 100% sure of, is that as a teenager, we have a right to dream. As Adidas put it so succinctly, I shall copy: “Impossible is nothing.” Consequently, due to the nature of my age and nothing else – that means putting aside the fact that I understand this cliché might just be the most ridiculous, ill-advised way of living – today, I begin a quest to re-shape (well really, re-write), history. My novels will replace Tolstoy’s brutal depiction of real life, comparing more favourably to the more joyful realms of Narnia. Dictators will have their names obliterated from history; it is not right for young children to endure such turmoil studying about things they can no longer affect.  Whilst the last major change I would make, is to have the socialist party and any other centre liberal party cease to exist to the people of the future. We have birds for sitting on fences; the public needs philosophies that either oppose or agree to any existent policies.                                                   One might infer that I want the world to be born again. I would have to agree.                                                                                                   

It is impossible not to notice the length of my sentences, and admittedly at times the quality of my syntax is not up to scratch, overall resulting in a rather exhausted and laborious blog post. But carrying on with the incessant questioning: am I expected to write punctually? Is it not all about fluidity, for people to read what you write easily? Of what I write, how much is expected to be interesting: 50%, 70%, even 90%? So many questions, and until the Chinese outdo the Americans again and successfully create a website providing instant answers, and inform me of a more relevant and reasonable reason to life at 17, I think patience will be the key to all knowledge.